Sarah Jessica Parker - Vogue Editorial
8 years ago
Monday, May 17, 2010
Shuttle Launch Photos
Okay, the last two posts have been all about seeing the shuttle launch last Friday. This post is all about the pictures. There are a few pics of the crowd waiting for the launch, one picture of the alligator in the spillway near our viewing location that caused a bit of a commotion and first, and then kept the kids in the area busy as they watched him; and a bunch of pix of the launch that Scott took. Enjoy!
The Good and the Bad
So in my last blog post, I talked about crossing "Watch a shuttle launch from close enough to see the vehicle" off my bucket list.
Over 300,000 people were in the area just to watch that launch of Friday. It was very crowded, and all the hotels and restaurants in the area were jam packed; and as is the case whenever large groups of humanity is crammed into a small area, it brings out the very best . . . and the very worst in human nature.
First off, let's talk about the good. I want to tell you about an older gentleman and his wife that had a profound impact on us. They were our hosts Friday for the shuttle launch. She is a cancer survivor, and he worked at Kennedy/Canaveral for over 48 years. They've got a house right on the waterfront and have a view of the launchpads. A few years ago, they got upset at all the businesses and private individuals who would charge tourists $10 or $20 to park their cars to watch the shuttle launch and then not even let those people use their bathrooms. Their solution? Let people park in their backyard and view the launches for free AND let them use the bathroom if they needed to. They just wanted to help people. To their dismay, people just would not let them offer free parking. They insisted on paying them something. So they decided that if people were going to pay, they'd give the money to charity, and picked a charity that meant something to them.
Technically, parking WAS free. They simply asked for a donation to the American Cancer Society for Breast Cancer research. Whatever we felt like giving. We asked what the usual donation was and they said $20. We gave them $80. (My mom is a breast cancer survivor and Scott lost his dad to Lung Cancer, we're big supporters of cancer research). On top of letting people park and view the shuttle launch, they also let people use their bathrooms, provided cookies, coffee, lemonade, iced tea (sweet and unsweet) and were the NICEST people. We looked at their yard and thought they could probably fit 20 cars in. We were reservation #55! All told, they crammed over 80 cars (including a few vans, big trucks, and one RV) onto their property. Toward the end people were parked all over their front yard and everything. They were loving it! I hope they raised a LOT of cash for the American Cancer Society (I know they did, they bragged that the last two years she's been the highest fund raiser in the county.) Thank goodness we went the night before and scouted for a place to watch, or we'd never have gotten a place with them, and I'd much rather have spent our money helping them raise funds than just give it to someone who was looking to profit off of the tourists. They really put an even more positive spin on what was already a wonderful experience. They're amazing, and I wish them nothing but the best.
Over 300,000 people were in the area just to watch that launch of Friday. It was very crowded, and all the hotels and restaurants in the area were jam packed; and as is the case whenever large groups of humanity is crammed into a small area, it brings out the very best . . . and the very worst in human nature.
First off, let's talk about the good. I want to tell you about an older gentleman and his wife that had a profound impact on us. They were our hosts Friday for the shuttle launch. She is a cancer survivor, and he worked at Kennedy/Canaveral for over 48 years. They've got a house right on the waterfront and have a view of the launchpads. A few years ago, they got upset at all the businesses and private individuals who would charge tourists $10 or $20 to park their cars to watch the shuttle launch and then not even let those people use their bathrooms. Their solution? Let people park in their backyard and view the launches for free AND let them use the bathroom if they needed to. They just wanted to help people. To their dismay, people just would not let them offer free parking. They insisted on paying them something. So they decided that if people were going to pay, they'd give the money to charity, and picked a charity that meant something to them.
Technically, parking WAS free. They simply asked for a donation to the American Cancer Society for Breast Cancer research. Whatever we felt like giving. We asked what the usual donation was and they said $20. We gave them $80. (My mom is a breast cancer survivor and Scott lost his dad to Lung Cancer, we're big supporters of cancer research). On top of letting people park and view the shuttle launch, they also let people use their bathrooms, provided cookies, coffee, lemonade, iced tea (sweet and unsweet) and were the NICEST people. We looked at their yard and thought they could probably fit 20 cars in. We were reservation #55! All told, they crammed over 80 cars (including a few vans, big trucks, and one RV) onto their property. Toward the end people were parked all over their front yard and everything. They were loving it! I hope they raised a LOT of cash for the American Cancer Society (I know they did, they bragged that the last two years she's been the highest fund raiser in the county.) Thank goodness we went the night before and scouted for a place to watch, or we'd never have gotten a place with them, and I'd much rather have spent our money helping them raise funds than just give it to someone who was looking to profit off of the tourists. They really put an even more positive spin on what was already a wonderful experience. They're amazing, and I wish them nothing but the best.
Then, of course, there was the bad. Thankfully, as the viewing area got full, the crowd was for the most part very friendly. As one of three obviously gay couples there, Scott and I did feel like some of the people around us were (very loudly) voicing their opinions on political issues that had nothing to do with the shuttle launch strictly for our benefit. At one point, I was afraid a "Tea Party" rally was going to break out beside us. Honestly, just because I'm a gay democrat with liberal views, why can I not also be a patriot? Since when did "patriotism" come to equal "conservative republican" or even "redneck asshole"? Scott and I decided to be the bigger men. and ignored them. If they wanted a confrontation, I wasn't in the mood to give them what they wanted. Or to let them spoil something I'd waited so long to do. Overall, the crowd was great, there was just that small group that had to be assholes about it. I hope they enjoyed the launch as much as I did. I joined them in chanting U.S.A. afterward. I guess regardless of what our political views, it's hard not to be proud of our country when we see one it's greatest technological acheivements soaring into space.
Sadly, that wasn't the worst we encountered during the weekend. While at dinner the night before, we were seated near the bar of the restaurant where we were dining. There were three guys at the bar who were very loud (why is it that the most idiotic among us are the ones who feel the need to broadcast their ignorant opinions the loudest?) and after talking about being in town to view the shuttle launch, they went on to decry the number of "yankees" who were also there, and one of them went on very pointed talking about how "we'd all be better off if the yankees had lost the war" because "we'd still have slaves" and there wouldn't be a "use your imagination for the vile word he used to describe our president" in the White House. Really? In 2010? I looked at Scott to make sure I was hearing what I was hearing. I shook my head and began to chuckle to myself. He kept talking but I tuned him out. He had no concept of history, let alone the reality we live in. For one thing, if the "yankees had lost the war" there would be TWO countries instead of the one he kept talking about, and Southerners would have no care about who was in the White House. Secondly, I don't think he realized that not everybody owned slaves. Sadly, slaves were a financial asset, and given his obvious lack of mental capability, I doubt he could ever have managed to hold onto finanical assets long enough to actually aquire any. Like I said, No concept of either history or reality. The sad thing is that he probably votes.
So, we had quite the interesting time on our overnight trip to the space coast. Overall, the better part of human nature out weighed the bad. Or at least I was able to ignore the bad enough to enjoy the once in a lifetime event we were there to see.
Next up, some shuttle launch photos.
Sadly, that wasn't the worst we encountered during the weekend. While at dinner the night before, we were seated near the bar of the restaurant where we were dining. There were three guys at the bar who were very loud (why is it that the most idiotic among us are the ones who feel the need to broadcast their ignorant opinions the loudest?) and after talking about being in town to view the shuttle launch, they went on to decry the number of "yankees" who were also there, and one of them went on very pointed talking about how "we'd all be better off if the yankees had lost the war" because "we'd still have slaves" and there wouldn't be a "use your imagination for the vile word he used to describe our president" in the White House. Really? In 2010? I looked at Scott to make sure I was hearing what I was hearing. I shook my head and began to chuckle to myself. He kept talking but I tuned him out. He had no concept of history, let alone the reality we live in. For one thing, if the "yankees had lost the war" there would be TWO countries instead of the one he kept talking about, and Southerners would have no care about who was in the White House. Secondly, I don't think he realized that not everybody owned slaves. Sadly, slaves were a financial asset, and given his obvious lack of mental capability, I doubt he could ever have managed to hold onto finanical assets long enough to actually aquire any. Like I said, No concept of either history or reality. The sad thing is that he probably votes.
So, we had quite the interesting time on our overnight trip to the space coast. Overall, the better part of human nature out weighed the bad. Or at least I was able to ignore the bad enough to enjoy the once in a lifetime event we were there to see.
Next up, some shuttle launch photos.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Today was a Bucket List Day . . .
Okay, I know I've been neglecting this blog horribly for the last six months, and I'm very sorry. I'll do my best to change that in the near future.
That said, I've got to tell you about my day today. You see, today was a Bucket List Day.
Not that I have a Bucket List per se, but there are definitely things I've got in the back of my mind that I want to do "someday". Happily that list isn't as long as it used to be. Things like "fall in love" and "live happily ever after" were crossed off the list when I met Scott; and together we've accomplished a few other items such as "attend High School reunion with same-sex partner and watch the reactions" (to the credit of my classmates, the reactions were overwhelmingly positive), "visit Paris", and "stand on a Broadway Stage" (sadly as a guest not as a performer, but you take what you can get).
For as long as I can remember, I've been fascinated by space flight. I remember being a kid in the early 70's and watching the big rockets on television as astronauts were going to the moon. When the shuttle had to be diverted to White Sands Missle Range in New Mexico and I was in grade school, I begged my parents to let us skip school and drive the mere seven hours across New Mexico to see the shuttle because it would likely never be that close to us again; and in High School I actually did stay home from school to watch the Challenger lift off, sadly it never made it into orbit and became the "where were you when . . . " moment of my generation.
So one of my "someday" things has been to see a space shuttle launch. Since we moved to Florida six years ago, we've seen several launches from our house. But that's just the bright rocket glare at night, or the smoke trail during the day. I wanted to actually SEE the shuttle itself at the top of that flame and smoke as it blasted itself free from the Earth's gravity and took astronauts to the stars (well, if not the stars, at least the space station). The scheduling was always off for us to head east and watch the launches, though.
Until today, that is. Wait. Let me backtrack a few weeks. We knew that this was our best option to see a shuttle launch due to it's mid-month timing a while back, so we planned to buy tickets to see it from the NASA viewing area. A couple of weeks ago, Scott got up early and logged into the site's "virtual waiting room" and waited to be randomly allowed to buy tickets. The prime launch location tickets were sold out in under two minutes! And the secondary viewing area was sold out in 20 minutes. We were out of luck. Several of the tickets showed up on eBay within the hour priced as high as $1000 per person, (marked up from the $58 that NASA sold them for. Let me just say now that I hate the people who bought tickets, not because they wanted them, but because they decided they could milk the people who DID want them for insane amounts of cash. There is a special level of hell reserved just for them.) we decided that purchasing tickets from scalpers on eBay was not in our price range, so we started looking for contingency options. We booked an overpriced hotel room in Titusville, FL (the town across the waterway from Kennedy Space Center) and began researching locations. There are several locations in Titusville where the shuttle launch is clearly visible, and we decided to try for one of those.
So last night, Scott picked me up from work and we drove out to Titusville and checked into our hotel. Then we drove along the waterfront part of town checking things out. We found a house with a bunch of signs offering reserved parking spaces for shuttle launch viewing with the proceeds going to charity (More description of this set-up will follow in a blog entry tomorrow or Sunday). It sounded like a great deal to us, so we forked over some cash and reserved a spot for the morning, and went off to dinner.
This morning we got up WAY too early, had breakfast and headed back to our reserved spot. We got there right at 8:00 am (for the 2:20pm launch time) and grabbed the last spot right on the water. Looking across at the space center, we could see the launch pad! All we had to do was wait.
It was hot, it got crowded, and I got midly sunburnt. But at 2:20pm today, I crossed an item off my bucket list.
Atlantis lifted on on her final mission and it was a beautiful thing to see! Pictures just don't do it justice. I was giddily laughing and crying at the same time. The shuttle arced to the left as it began to track toward it's orbit to meet the international space station and then the sound hit us. And the rumble. We could FEEL it! It was amazing. The crowd began to clap and cheer, and I was transfixed. It was SO FUCKING COOL!
Eventually the shuttle was no longer visible, and the crowd slowly dispersed (we were finally able to leave our parking space two hours later) and the normally hour long drive home took nearly three hours.
We're sunburt, we're exhausted, we're punchy, and we're in agreement that it was TOTALLY WORTH IT!
So that's where I'm at. One less thing on the bucket list. Not sure what I'll tackle next . . .
In the meantime, what have you got on your bucket list?
That said, I've got to tell you about my day today. You see, today was a Bucket List Day.
Not that I have a Bucket List per se, but there are definitely things I've got in the back of my mind that I want to do "someday". Happily that list isn't as long as it used to be. Things like "fall in love" and "live happily ever after" were crossed off the list when I met Scott; and together we've accomplished a few other items such as "attend High School reunion with same-sex partner and watch the reactions" (to the credit of my classmates, the reactions were overwhelmingly positive), "visit Paris", and "stand on a Broadway Stage" (sadly as a guest not as a performer, but you take what you can get).
For as long as I can remember, I've been fascinated by space flight. I remember being a kid in the early 70's and watching the big rockets on television as astronauts were going to the moon. When the shuttle had to be diverted to White Sands Missle Range in New Mexico and I was in grade school, I begged my parents to let us skip school and drive the mere seven hours across New Mexico to see the shuttle because it would likely never be that close to us again; and in High School I actually did stay home from school to watch the Challenger lift off, sadly it never made it into orbit and became the "where were you when . . . " moment of my generation.
So one of my "someday" things has been to see a space shuttle launch. Since we moved to Florida six years ago, we've seen several launches from our house. But that's just the bright rocket glare at night, or the smoke trail during the day. I wanted to actually SEE the shuttle itself at the top of that flame and smoke as it blasted itself free from the Earth's gravity and took astronauts to the stars (well, if not the stars, at least the space station). The scheduling was always off for us to head east and watch the launches, though.
Until today, that is. Wait. Let me backtrack a few weeks. We knew that this was our best option to see a shuttle launch due to it's mid-month timing a while back, so we planned to buy tickets to see it from the NASA viewing area. A couple of weeks ago, Scott got up early and logged into the site's "virtual waiting room" and waited to be randomly allowed to buy tickets. The prime launch location tickets were sold out in under two minutes! And the secondary viewing area was sold out in 20 minutes. We were out of luck. Several of the tickets showed up on eBay within the hour priced as high as $1000 per person, (marked up from the $58 that NASA sold them for. Let me just say now that I hate the people who bought tickets, not because they wanted them, but because they decided they could milk the people who DID want them for insane amounts of cash. There is a special level of hell reserved just for them.) we decided that purchasing tickets from scalpers on eBay was not in our price range, so we started looking for contingency options. We booked an overpriced hotel room in Titusville, FL (the town across the waterway from Kennedy Space Center) and began researching locations. There are several locations in Titusville where the shuttle launch is clearly visible, and we decided to try for one of those.
So last night, Scott picked me up from work and we drove out to Titusville and checked into our hotel. Then we drove along the waterfront part of town checking things out. We found a house with a bunch of signs offering reserved parking spaces for shuttle launch viewing with the proceeds going to charity (More description of this set-up will follow in a blog entry tomorrow or Sunday). It sounded like a great deal to us, so we forked over some cash and reserved a spot for the morning, and went off to dinner.
This morning we got up WAY too early, had breakfast and headed back to our reserved spot. We got there right at 8:00 am (for the 2:20pm launch time) and grabbed the last spot right on the water. Looking across at the space center, we could see the launch pad! All we had to do was wait.
It was hot, it got crowded, and I got midly sunburnt. But at 2:20pm today, I crossed an item off my bucket list.
Atlantis lifted on on her final mission and it was a beautiful thing to see! Pictures just don't do it justice. I was giddily laughing and crying at the same time. The shuttle arced to the left as it began to track toward it's orbit to meet the international space station and then the sound hit us. And the rumble. We could FEEL it! It was amazing. The crowd began to clap and cheer, and I was transfixed. It was SO FUCKING COOL!
Eventually the shuttle was no longer visible, and the crowd slowly dispersed (we were finally able to leave our parking space two hours later) and the normally hour long drive home took nearly three hours.
We're sunburt, we're exhausted, we're punchy, and we're in agreement that it was TOTALLY WORTH IT!
So that's where I'm at. One less thing on the bucket list. Not sure what I'll tackle next . . .
In the meantime, what have you got on your bucket list?
Sunday, November 8, 2009
What in the Gay Hell . . . . ?
A while back a news item caught my eye.
It seems that Mattel has decided to launch a "Palm Beach" line of Barbie Dolls and her friends. Included amongst these is
Sugar Daddy Ken.
What in the GAY HELL is that supposed to be!
Oh. My. God! I always suspected that Ken was a little on the closeted side; I mean really, he's awfully "stylish" and is always hanging around with Barbie, Skipper, Pepper and all of those vixens. He had all the signs of gay BFF long before Will met Grace. And let's face it. We all knew once we pulled down his pants that Barbie was only staying with him to get the dream house and the dream car. If you know what I mean.
But THIS! This is so . . . so . . . stereotypically "old moneyed queen trolling for rent boys in South Beach". Blech!
I don't get it. If they're going to have Ken come out of the closet, at least give him the dignity of not debuting as an old troll with a yappy dog.
It's just tragic!
Sigh.
It makes me nostalgic for the days of Bob the Gay Doll (the first gay doll. released in 1977)
Oh well. At least if they're going to make Ken a "Sugar Daddy" maybe they can have one of the Billy dolls as his boytoy.
By the way. Yes, I know I've been neglecting my blog lately. But work has been batshit crazy, and we've been really busy at home. So the blogging has suffered a bit. I'll try to get back here more often.
It seems that Mattel has decided to launch a "Palm Beach" line of Barbie Dolls and her friends. Included amongst these is
Sugar Daddy Ken.
What in the GAY HELL is that supposed to be!
Oh. My. God! I always suspected that Ken was a little on the closeted side; I mean really, he's awfully "stylish" and is always hanging around with Barbie, Skipper, Pepper and all of those vixens. He had all the signs of gay BFF long before Will met Grace. And let's face it. We all knew once we pulled down his pants that Barbie was only staying with him to get the dream house and the dream car. If you know what I mean.
But THIS! This is so . . . so . . . stereotypically "old moneyed queen trolling for rent boys in South Beach". Blech!
I don't get it. If they're going to have Ken come out of the closet, at least give him the dignity of not debuting as an old troll with a yappy dog.
It's just tragic!
Sigh.
It makes me nostalgic for the days of Bob the Gay Doll (the first gay doll. released in 1977)
Oh well. At least if they're going to make Ken a "Sugar Daddy" maybe they can have one of the Billy dolls as his boytoy.
By the way. Yes, I know I've been neglecting my blog lately. But work has been batshit crazy, and we've been really busy at home. So the blogging has suffered a bit. I'll try to get back here more often.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
The sun will come out . . .
It's interesting. In the days since I posted about National Coming Out Day and the National Equality March, the gay community has entered into a rather heated conversation.
A lot of this conversation revolves around President Obama's speech at the Annual Human Right's Campaign Dinner on Saturday night. President Obama re-iterated his promises to overturn Don't Ask Don't Tell and the (so called) Defense of Marriage Act along with signing hate crimes legislation and employment discrimination protections for GLBT people.
It seems the gay community is divided pretty much down the middle. There are the people who are happy with Obama's promises and think that the GLBT community should be satisfied to "wait its turn" while the president focuses on the war efforts in Iraq and Afghanistan, healthcare reform, and the lousy economy. Then there are those who think that action is coming too slowly and that our community shouldn't settle for "tomorrow"; but should demand "NOW!"
As for myself, I have to say "wait until it's a better time" reeks of "the check is in the mail." It's an empty promise used to avoid confrontation over an issue that they don't want to discuss.
GLBT equality is just as important an issue as all the rest. It's insulting and demeaning to imply that equal rights for American Citizens is a lower priority than anything else. The assumption that all men are created equal is the basis of our country. It should be the FIRST priority. Anything less is unacceptable.
Would the African-American community have asked Rosa Parks to sit back in the rear of the bus until the Cold War was over? Would they have asked Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. to postpone his dream until after Viet Nam? Of course not! Why then are our own leaders telling us to wait?
A lot of people are saying that Obama and the Democratic controlled congress are gearing up for the next election; that they need to be careful now, and not do anything TOO controversial until they've gotten reelected. That's a load of bullshit. You know what? There's ALWAYS going to be another election coming. And if we buy that as a stall tactic now, they'll expect us to roll over for it next time, and the time after. If we continue to wait until equality is convenient for everyone else, we will NEVER get it
The thing is. Nobody should be asking us to wait! Gay Rights are GOOD for the country! Allowing gays to serve openly in the military would immediately help the war effort because it'd mean the Armed Forces would stop losing so many good people. In my last blog I talked about how much gay couples have to pay to approximate what straight couples take for granted. Imagine if all those gay couples could stop paying that money to lawyers and were able to spend it on goods and services. Wouldn't that help the overall economy? And when we've got to pay the "marriage penalty" tax that straight couples have to pay, wouldn't that benefit the treasury of the United States?
And then you start looking at little factoids like "Massachusetts has the lowest divorce rate in the country". Wow, I guess gay marriage won't destroy the country and ring the death knell for "traditional marriage" after all.
I'm sorry folks. The HRC has it wrong. We need to leave the singing of "Tomorrow" to Annie, and start demanding "TODAY!" from our leaders. Be they leaders of the GLBT movement, or our elected leaders at the City, County, State, and Federal level.
The squeaky wheel get's the grease. So we're going to need to start squeaking. A LOT!
I'm an AMERICAN!
I pay my TAXES!
I demand my RIGHTS!
NOW!
A lot of this conversation revolves around President Obama's speech at the Annual Human Right's Campaign Dinner on Saturday night. President Obama re-iterated his promises to overturn Don't Ask Don't Tell and the (so called) Defense of Marriage Act along with signing hate crimes legislation and employment discrimination protections for GLBT people.
It seems the gay community is divided pretty much down the middle. There are the people who are happy with Obama's promises and think that the GLBT community should be satisfied to "wait its turn" while the president focuses on the war efforts in Iraq and Afghanistan, healthcare reform, and the lousy economy. Then there are those who think that action is coming too slowly and that our community shouldn't settle for "tomorrow"; but should demand "NOW!"
As for myself, I have to say "wait until it's a better time" reeks of "the check is in the mail." It's an empty promise used to avoid confrontation over an issue that they don't want to discuss.
GLBT equality is just as important an issue as all the rest. It's insulting and demeaning to imply that equal rights for American Citizens is a lower priority than anything else. The assumption that all men are created equal is the basis of our country. It should be the FIRST priority. Anything less is unacceptable.
Would the African-American community have asked Rosa Parks to sit back in the rear of the bus until the Cold War was over? Would they have asked Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. to postpone his dream until after Viet Nam? Of course not! Why then are our own leaders telling us to wait?
A lot of people are saying that Obama and the Democratic controlled congress are gearing up for the next election; that they need to be careful now, and not do anything TOO controversial until they've gotten reelected. That's a load of bullshit. You know what? There's ALWAYS going to be another election coming. And if we buy that as a stall tactic now, they'll expect us to roll over for it next time, and the time after. If we continue to wait until equality is convenient for everyone else, we will NEVER get it
The thing is. Nobody should be asking us to wait! Gay Rights are GOOD for the country! Allowing gays to serve openly in the military would immediately help the war effort because it'd mean the Armed Forces would stop losing so many good people. In my last blog I talked about how much gay couples have to pay to approximate what straight couples take for granted. Imagine if all those gay couples could stop paying that money to lawyers and were able to spend it on goods and services. Wouldn't that help the overall economy? And when we've got to pay the "marriage penalty" tax that straight couples have to pay, wouldn't that benefit the treasury of the United States?
And then you start looking at little factoids like "Massachusetts has the lowest divorce rate in the country". Wow, I guess gay marriage won't destroy the country and ring the death knell for "traditional marriage" after all.
I'm sorry folks. The HRC has it wrong. We need to leave the singing of "Tomorrow" to Annie, and start demanding "TODAY!" from our leaders. Be they leaders of the GLBT movement, or our elected leaders at the City, County, State, and Federal level.
The squeaky wheel get's the grease. So we're going to need to start squeaking. A LOT!
I'm an AMERICAN!
I pay my TAXES!
I demand my RIGHTS!
NOW!
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Marching along . . .
My last blog was about things that I shouldn't take for granted. Today's blog is about things that YOU shouldn't take for granted.
You see, today is National Coming Out Day; and the day of the National Equality March in Washington D.C. And today is the day we're discussing all the ways that Gays and Lesbians aren't equal right here in the "land of the free".
Just in case anyone wasn't already 100% clear . . . I'm gay. Scott is my husband. We were married last year. Not legally, of course, because we live in Florida. But we did have a Big Fat Gay Disney Wedding, and we're as married as any other couple we know. Heck more married than some.
So, my dear straight friends, this is about things that we don't have that you shouldn't take for granted.
For instance, a married couple is automatically designated as next of kin for each other. They get the right to see and make medical decisions for their partner if the partner is incapacitated. This isn't the case for gay couples. And even though Scott and I have given each other Medical Power of Attorney, there's no guarantee that it'll be honored by any given hospital. Here's a case in South Florida where a woman was kept from the bedside of her dying partner. The hospital told her that Florida is an "anti-gay state" and that they wouldn't honor her legal documents. To make matters worse, when the woman sued the hospital, the courts backed the hospital!
This terrifies us. We live in Florida. And even though we've taken all the legal steps that we can to protect ourselves, it's still possible for some bigot to decide to ignore those protections.
Speaking of taking those steps to protect ourselves, we had to spend quite a bit of money to get the legal documents drawn up. Let me tell you, Brittney Spears paid a LOT less for her quickie wedding than Scott and I paid for wills, power of attorney, etc. And we don't even get the full compliment of protections that she threw away when she changed her mind and kicked the guy to the curb a day later.
They New York Times recently did a study on the costs of being a gay couple. In other words, what it costs us to accomplish what straight couples get simply by being married. It's a variable statistic of course; but on the low end, a gay couple has to spend over $25,000 to approximate what a straight couple has. In some cases, the amount can go up to nearly HALF A MILLION DOLLARS!
Tell me again, how "we hold these truths to be self evident" that all Americans are equal? Bullshit.
I could go on and on and on, of course. The gist of my message is this. I'm and American Citizen! I pay my taxes! I want equality!
If you've got it, don't take it for granted. And do what you can to help those of us who are getting a bum deal.
I wish that we could been in Washington today to march along with them. We couldn't. But that doesn't matter. The spirit of the march is that we keep fighting. And by doing what we can day to day, we are always marching along . . .
You see, today is National Coming Out Day; and the day of the National Equality March in Washington D.C. And today is the day we're discussing all the ways that Gays and Lesbians aren't equal right here in the "land of the free".
Just in case anyone wasn't already 100% clear . . . I'm gay. Scott is my husband. We were married last year. Not legally, of course, because we live in Florida. But we did have a Big Fat Gay Disney Wedding, and we're as married as any other couple we know. Heck more married than some.
So, my dear straight friends, this is about things that we don't have that you shouldn't take for granted.
For instance, a married couple is automatically designated as next of kin for each other. They get the right to see and make medical decisions for their partner if the partner is incapacitated. This isn't the case for gay couples. And even though Scott and I have given each other Medical Power of Attorney, there's no guarantee that it'll be honored by any given hospital. Here's a case in South Florida where a woman was kept from the bedside of her dying partner. The hospital told her that Florida is an "anti-gay state" and that they wouldn't honor her legal documents. To make matters worse, when the woman sued the hospital, the courts backed the hospital!
This terrifies us. We live in Florida. And even though we've taken all the legal steps that we can to protect ourselves, it's still possible for some bigot to decide to ignore those protections.
Speaking of taking those steps to protect ourselves, we had to spend quite a bit of money to get the legal documents drawn up. Let me tell you, Brittney Spears paid a LOT less for her quickie wedding than Scott and I paid for wills, power of attorney, etc. And we don't even get the full compliment of protections that she threw away when she changed her mind and kicked the guy to the curb a day later.
They New York Times recently did a study on the costs of being a gay couple. In other words, what it costs us to accomplish what straight couples get simply by being married. It's a variable statistic of course; but on the low end, a gay couple has to spend over $25,000 to approximate what a straight couple has. In some cases, the amount can go up to nearly HALF A MILLION DOLLARS!
Tell me again, how "we hold these truths to be self evident" that all Americans are equal? Bullshit.
I could go on and on and on, of course. The gist of my message is this. I'm and American Citizen! I pay my taxes! I want equality!
If you've got it, don't take it for granted. And do what you can to help those of us who are getting a bum deal.
I wish that we could been in Washington today to march along with them. We couldn't. But that doesn't matter. The spirit of the march is that we keep fighting. And by doing what we can day to day, we are always marching along . . .
Monday, October 5, 2009
Not taking things for granted . . .
A lot of things recently have made me stop and think. And think hard.
A very dear friend of mine, the very picture of health and fitness spent a week in the hospital with a pulmonary embolism that nearly killed her. A risk of her job, and birth control, yes. But a very scary wake-up call nonetheless. I'm not taking my friends for granted today.
A lovely lady who I've had the privilege of watching perform lost her husband this weekend. He had a heart attack while riding his motorcycle. It was their second wedding anniversary. I'm not taking Scott for granted today.
Two different friends have lost their pet cats this week. To be honest, I'm not a cat person, but the loss of any friend, be they two legged or four legged, is difficult. It's like walking around with a hole in your life. I'm not taking Tolliver for granted today.
I had the chance to meet new friends over the past couple of weeks. People that I knew online, but now have connected with and laughed with in person. I'm not taking opportunities to change and grow for granted today.
I listened to an acquaintance talk about how poorly his parents and family had treated him. I'm not taking my loving, accepting family for granted today.
I've mentioned the Adventurers Club in this blog before. It's been closed for a year now, but we've gotten word that they've begun to strip it bare in preparation for demolition. I'm not taking good times and laughter for granted today.
I've got several friends who have become unemployed recently. I'm not taking my job for granted today.
I've had a lot of medical tests and dental issues lately. Things are fine, but I'm not taking my health for granted today.
Life is funny. Sometimes it takes some really crappy news to make you realize how lucky you are.
I am. And I promise myself that I'm going to remember that I am.
Sorry that this blog post is such a downer today. But it's where my head is at right now.
I promise I'll try and be witty and amusing on the next one.
For now, it's time for bed. Tomorrow is another day . . .
. . . and, I'm not going to take it for granted.
A very dear friend of mine, the very picture of health and fitness spent a week in the hospital with a pulmonary embolism that nearly killed her. A risk of her job, and birth control, yes. But a very scary wake-up call nonetheless. I'm not taking my friends for granted today.
A lovely lady who I've had the privilege of watching perform lost her husband this weekend. He had a heart attack while riding his motorcycle. It was their second wedding anniversary. I'm not taking Scott for granted today.
Two different friends have lost their pet cats this week. To be honest, I'm not a cat person, but the loss of any friend, be they two legged or four legged, is difficult. It's like walking around with a hole in your life. I'm not taking Tolliver for granted today.
I had the chance to meet new friends over the past couple of weeks. People that I knew online, but now have connected with and laughed with in person. I'm not taking opportunities to change and grow for granted today.
I listened to an acquaintance talk about how poorly his parents and family had treated him. I'm not taking my loving, accepting family for granted today.
I've mentioned the Adventurers Club in this blog before. It's been closed for a year now, but we've gotten word that they've begun to strip it bare in preparation for demolition. I'm not taking good times and laughter for granted today.
I've got several friends who have become unemployed recently. I'm not taking my job for granted today.
I've had a lot of medical tests and dental issues lately. Things are fine, but I'm not taking my health for granted today.
Life is funny. Sometimes it takes some really crappy news to make you realize how lucky you are.
I am. And I promise myself that I'm going to remember that I am.
Sorry that this blog post is such a downer today. But it's where my head is at right now.
I promise I'll try and be witty and amusing on the next one.
For now, it's time for bed. Tomorrow is another day . . .
. . . and, I'm not going to take it for granted.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Making it up as we go along . . .
So, at the end of my last blog post, I mentioned that we were going to spend our "It's a year after our Big Fat Gay Disney Wedding" Monday night eating a nice home cooked meal together. Part of that meal was an experiment that worked out really well, so I'm sharing it with you. No need to thank me . . . actually . . . go ahead . . . thank me; 'cuz this one is GOOD!
After watching way too much of the Food Network and Top Chef I've been inspired to try some new things, or try doing old things in new ways. This isn't always a good thing. Ask Scott to tell you about the red chile rice that was to hot for either of us to eat.
Scott really likes french onion soup. I can take it or leave it, but there are usually a lot of other things on the menu I'd rather eat, though. It's not that I don't like the flavors involved. Heck, onions, beef broth, toasted bread and melted gruyere . . . what's not to like?
So, I decided to play with one of Scott's favorites. A risky prospect. If it turned out well, then I look like a genius; if it turns out badly, Scott's got ammunition to hold over my head for all time. Nobody ever said I don't like the occasional challenge.
I went and bought a couple cans of Campbell's french onion soup, some shredded swiss chees blend (the Sargento brand swiss cheese mix, to be specific. It's very good, you can definitely taste the gruyere in it) and knowing that we had a nice couple of steaks to grill, set out to create a great new side dish to add to our repertoire. I kind of flew by the seat of my pants, and made it up on the fly, but in the end . . . YUMMY! I guess I'm a genius after all! Woo hoo!
So, here's the recipe for the result.
Rob's French Onion Risotto
Ingredients:
1/3 Cup Extra Virgin Olive Oil
2 Cans of Campbell’s condensed French Onion Soup
2 Cans full of water (to re-constitute the soup)
1 Cup of Arborio rice
.5 Cup of shredded gruyere (or Swiss cheese blend) and a bit more for garnishing at the end
Salt & Pepper
First, in a large measuring cup or mixing bowl, combine the condensed soup and the water, and stir together.
Pour the oil into the bottom of a large sauce pan turn the heat up to high. When the oil is hot, add the rice. Stir vigorously for two minutes with a wooden spoon (the rice should just be starting to brown). When the rice is just beginning to get some color, add two ladles of the soup, and turn the heat to medium high. Keep stirring consistantly as the rice absorbs the broth. Once the broth has been absorbed by the rice, add another ladle of the soup and keep stirring. Continue to stir and add additional soup every time it gets absorbed by the rice. After the about six ladles full of broth have been added, check the texture of the rice. It should be soft like any cooked rice, but not mushy. If it's not done, continue to ladle more soup into the risotto and stir it in.
Yes, it's a lot of stirring! My brother, the chef, says that once you start a risotto, you're married to it until it's done.
Once the rice has reached the desired texture, add the shredded swiss cheese, stir in completely and remove the risotto from the heat.
Let it sit for about five minutes.
We paired the risotto with two nice thick rib-eye steaks, steamed green beans dressed with olive oil and garlic pepper, and we opened up a bottle of our favorite chianti (the one we discovered when we were in Florence, natch) It was all very good. But I'm pretty sure that we would both have been happy with just a big plate of the risotto.
So that's it. Give it a try, and then come back and tell me how awesome I am!
After watching way too much of the Food Network and Top Chef I've been inspired to try some new things, or try doing old things in new ways. This isn't always a good thing. Ask Scott to tell you about the red chile rice that was to hot for either of us to eat.
Scott really likes french onion soup. I can take it or leave it, but there are usually a lot of other things on the menu I'd rather eat, though. It's not that I don't like the flavors involved. Heck, onions, beef broth, toasted bread and melted gruyere . . . what's not to like?
So, I decided to play with one of Scott's favorites. A risky prospect. If it turned out well, then I look like a genius; if it turns out badly, Scott's got ammunition to hold over my head for all time. Nobody ever said I don't like the occasional challenge.
I went and bought a couple cans of Campbell's french onion soup, some shredded swiss chees blend (the Sargento brand swiss cheese mix, to be specific. It's very good, you can definitely taste the gruyere in it) and knowing that we had a nice couple of steaks to grill, set out to create a great new side dish to add to our repertoire. I kind of flew by the seat of my pants, and made it up on the fly, but in the end . . . YUMMY! I guess I'm a genius after all! Woo hoo!
So, here's the recipe for the result.
Rob's French Onion Risotto
Ingredients:
1/3 Cup Extra Virgin Olive Oil
2 Cans of Campbell’s condensed French Onion Soup
2 Cans full of water (to re-constitute the soup)
1 Cup of Arborio rice
.5 Cup of shredded gruyere (or Swiss cheese blend) and a bit more for garnishing at the end
Salt & Pepper
First, in a large measuring cup or mixing bowl, combine the condensed soup and the water, and stir together.
Pour the oil into the bottom of a large sauce pan turn the heat up to high. When the oil is hot, add the rice. Stir vigorously for two minutes with a wooden spoon (the rice should just be starting to brown). When the rice is just beginning to get some color, add two ladles of the soup, and turn the heat to medium high. Keep stirring consistantly as the rice absorbs the broth. Once the broth has been absorbed by the rice, add another ladle of the soup and keep stirring. Continue to stir and add additional soup every time it gets absorbed by the rice. After the about six ladles full of broth have been added, check the texture of the rice. It should be soft like any cooked rice, but not mushy. If it's not done, continue to ladle more soup into the risotto and stir it in.
Yes, it's a lot of stirring! My brother, the chef, says that once you start a risotto, you're married to it until it's done.
Once the rice has reached the desired texture, add the shredded swiss cheese, stir in completely and remove the risotto from the heat.
Let it sit for about five minutes.
We paired the risotto with two nice thick rib-eye steaks, steamed green beans dressed with olive oil and garlic pepper, and we opened up a bottle of our favorite chianti (the one we discovered when we were in Florence, natch) It was all very good. But I'm pretty sure that we would both have been happy with just a big plate of the risotto.
So that's it. Give it a try, and then come back and tell me how awesome I am!
Monday, September 28, 2009
What a difference a year makes . . . Part Two
Okay, so yesterday, I talked about the fact that our favorite place closed on September 27th last year.
Now we get to talk about the fun stuff that happened last year on September 28th. You see, we'd planned our Big Fat Gay Disney Wedding 15 months in advance. So we had no idea that we'd be getting married at the Adventurers Club the day after it closed.
The club's closing was distressing enough, but it was going to close the NIGHT BEFORE OUR WEDDING! We nearly called it off. We were so stressed, and so upset.
Looking back now, we're so happy we stuck to our original plan and had our ceremony at the club. It was a great way to say good-bye to the place.
So today, we're remembering what a great time we had exactly a year ago today. And it was a truly GREAT time. Sure, a Disney wedding ain't cheap. And sure, it's not legal in Florida. But we did it anyway. And we wouldn't change any of it. We had a blast. Our family had a blast. Our friends had a blast. It was just . . . a BLAST! Good times, good food, good drinks, and excellent company. A winning combination.
And here we are a year later. Not much has changed of our day to day life, actually. We've been together for six years, and we've been living in this house for over four. And we've had Tolliver for nearly two years. So our daily routine didn't change much after the wedding; with the exception that we've got wedding bands on our hands now. And they occasionally get left on a bathroom counter or something.
But something did change in our outlook. Mostly, the change came in early November when Florida along with California and Arkansas passed hateful ant-gay legislation. We've become a lot more vocal in talking about our marriage since then. Not that we were ever really "in the closet" or anything, but now. Well now we engage people in the conversation. We let them know how very married we are, and how little our relationship differs from other married couples. Except that we don't get equal protection under the law for ours. And we explain exactly what that means. You'd be amazed at how many people didn't realize just how unprotected their gay friends and family are. Even with all the legal steps like wills, and power of attorney in place, gay couples aren't even remotely equal in the eyes of the law or the federal government. And rather than letting that discrimination go un-noticed, we've started to speak up.
It's going to be a long hard fight, but we'll get there someday.
But today isn't the day to focus on the fight for freedom.
Today is the day to celebrate what we've already accomplished. Scott and I will be spending a nice quiet night at home alone with a home cooked meal. Nothing fancy, but it sure does feel like something a married couple would do. Well, this married couple at least.
Now we get to talk about the fun stuff that happened last year on September 28th. You see, we'd planned our Big Fat Gay Disney Wedding 15 months in advance. So we had no idea that we'd be getting married at the Adventurers Club the day after it closed.
The club's closing was distressing enough, but it was going to close the NIGHT BEFORE OUR WEDDING! We nearly called it off. We were so stressed, and so upset.
Looking back now, we're so happy we stuck to our original plan and had our ceremony at the club. It was a great way to say good-bye to the place.
So today, we're remembering what a great time we had exactly a year ago today. And it was a truly GREAT time. Sure, a Disney wedding ain't cheap. And sure, it's not legal in Florida. But we did it anyway. And we wouldn't change any of it. We had a blast. Our family had a blast. Our friends had a blast. It was just . . . a BLAST! Good times, good food, good drinks, and excellent company. A winning combination.
And here we are a year later. Not much has changed of our day to day life, actually. We've been together for six years, and we've been living in this house for over four. And we've had Tolliver for nearly two years. So our daily routine didn't change much after the wedding; with the exception that we've got wedding bands on our hands now. And they occasionally get left on a bathroom counter or something.
But something did change in our outlook. Mostly, the change came in early November when Florida along with California and Arkansas passed hateful ant-gay legislation. We've become a lot more vocal in talking about our marriage since then. Not that we were ever really "in the closet" or anything, but now. Well now we engage people in the conversation. We let them know how very married we are, and how little our relationship differs from other married couples. Except that we don't get equal protection under the law for ours. And we explain exactly what that means. You'd be amazed at how many people didn't realize just how unprotected their gay friends and family are. Even with all the legal steps like wills, and power of attorney in place, gay couples aren't even remotely equal in the eyes of the law or the federal government. And rather than letting that discrimination go un-noticed, we've started to speak up.
It's going to be a long hard fight, but we'll get there someday.
But today isn't the day to focus on the fight for freedom.
Today is the day to celebrate what we've already accomplished. Scott and I will be spending a nice quiet night at home alone with a home cooked meal. Nothing fancy, but it sure does feel like something a married couple would do. Well, this married couple at least.
Sunday, September 27, 2009
What a difference a year makes . . . Part One
There have been a lot of things going on lately that have me reflecting back to the last weekend in September of last year.
You see, the last weekend in September was a life-changing time for Scott and me. In some ways that were of our own devising, and in some ways that were not.
Let's start with the things over which we had no control.
A year ago today, the powers that be closed the clubs at Disney World's Pleasure Island. This was a particularly difficult blow to us, as one of those clubs, The Adventurers Club, had become very important to us. Scott and I met at Pleasure Island (at the retro-themed night club, 8-Traxx, to be specific) five years earlier during Gay Days of 2003. Our first date started at the Adventurers Club; and when we moved to Orlando a year later, we were drawn to this unique and wonderful attraction masquerading as a night club.
As theatre geeks, we were both thrilled with the interactive performance of the very talented cast of the AdvClub. The audience interaction, the rotation of actors through the roles from night to night, the semi-scripted nature of it, and the sheer joy of it captivated us.
As Disney geeks, we were agog at the intricate level of themed detail that brought a 1937 Explorers club to life each night. The decor, the special effects, the architecture . . . everything worked so harmoniously to create a magical world, where our hardy band of adventurers welcomed strangers into the "once a year, open house and membership drive of 1937" every single night. It was something that nobody but Disney could have even attempted, let alone pulled off so amazingly well.
As a new couple, both starting over in a new town, we discovered something even more magical than either excellent theatre or Disney excellence at the AdvClub. We found an amazing group of friends. Slowly, we got to know other people who frequented the club, the bar staff, and a couple of the performers. Among the frequent club goers, we found our family. Well, our "Florida Family" anyway. Our social life revolved around the Adventurers Club, no doubt about it. The Adventurers Club Creed includes the lines "If you come in here a stranger, you will exit as a friend." That's just what happened for us. Our best friends were there, we had only to go and meet them. Every time we'd walk into the club, it was like coming home from a trip, and having everyone be happy to see you. Being told that it was being taken away from us was . . . well, words aren't adequate to describe how angry, sad, lost, and betrayed we felt. And the circumstances of the closing weekend were even more painful to us, and I'll touch on that in part two.
So, our beloved club was shuttered. Our "Florida Family" has still managed to stay together, and we see each other with enough regularity that we remain close friends. But we miss seeing each other weekly, and we miss seeing everyone else from the club as well. We rarely get to see our other friends, the ones that were pleasant acquaintances, or bar staff, or performers, or wonderful people who we really liked but weren't able to make it to the club as much as some of the rest of us. And sadly, when we do get to see them these days, it's for a painfully brief amount of time.
A little piece of my inner child died that last night we spent at the club. And the world is a less magical place for the loss.
Sure, we've soldiered on, as any good adventurer is supposed to do, but we miss is still. As much as we did the first weekend night where we would normally have gone to Pleasure Island and were left with nowhere to go.
Life has gone on, to be sure. But this weekend, I can't help but be reminded of the last line of the Adventurers Club Theme Song:
"An Adventurers Life is Best . . . . . "
You see, the last weekend in September was a life-changing time for Scott and me. In some ways that were of our own devising, and in some ways that were not.
Let's start with the things over which we had no control.
A year ago today, the powers that be closed the clubs at Disney World's Pleasure Island. This was a particularly difficult blow to us, as one of those clubs, The Adventurers Club, had become very important to us. Scott and I met at Pleasure Island (at the retro-themed night club, 8-Traxx, to be specific) five years earlier during Gay Days of 2003. Our first date started at the Adventurers Club; and when we moved to Orlando a year later, we were drawn to this unique and wonderful attraction masquerading as a night club.
As theatre geeks, we were both thrilled with the interactive performance of the very talented cast of the AdvClub. The audience interaction, the rotation of actors through the roles from night to night, the semi-scripted nature of it, and the sheer joy of it captivated us.
As Disney geeks, we were agog at the intricate level of themed detail that brought a 1937 Explorers club to life each night. The decor, the special effects, the architecture . . . everything worked so harmoniously to create a magical world, where our hardy band of adventurers welcomed strangers into the "once a year, open house and membership drive of 1937" every single night. It was something that nobody but Disney could have even attempted, let alone pulled off so amazingly well.
As a new couple, both starting over in a new town, we discovered something even more magical than either excellent theatre or Disney excellence at the AdvClub. We found an amazing group of friends. Slowly, we got to know other people who frequented the club, the bar staff, and a couple of the performers. Among the frequent club goers, we found our family. Well, our "Florida Family" anyway. Our social life revolved around the Adventurers Club, no doubt about it. The Adventurers Club Creed includes the lines "If you come in here a stranger, you will exit as a friend." That's just what happened for us. Our best friends were there, we had only to go and meet them. Every time we'd walk into the club, it was like coming home from a trip, and having everyone be happy to see you. Being told that it was being taken away from us was . . . well, words aren't adequate to describe how angry, sad, lost, and betrayed we felt. And the circumstances of the closing weekend were even more painful to us, and I'll touch on that in part two.
So, our beloved club was shuttered. Our "Florida Family" has still managed to stay together, and we see each other with enough regularity that we remain close friends. But we miss seeing each other weekly, and we miss seeing everyone else from the club as well. We rarely get to see our other friends, the ones that were pleasant acquaintances, or bar staff, or performers, or wonderful people who we really liked but weren't able to make it to the club as much as some of the rest of us. And sadly, when we do get to see them these days, it's for a painfully brief amount of time.
A little piece of my inner child died that last night we spent at the club. And the world is a less magical place for the loss.
Sure, we've soldiered on, as any good adventurer is supposed to do, but we miss is still. As much as we did the first weekend night where we would normally have gone to Pleasure Island and were left with nowhere to go.
Life has gone on, to be sure. But this weekend, I can't help but be reminded of the last line of the Adventurers Club Theme Song:
"An Adventurers Life is Best . . . . . "
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